You know your a mom to boys when...

You are getting your 6 year old's bath ready and in the drain of the tub is a little turd nugget.  Sunday evening Noah was getting ready to take his bath and I notice something in the drain.  One thing was a piece of foam cup and then I see something else in there.  I go to the kitchen and get a skewer to pull whatever it was out.  I had just given the dog a Listerine rinse in the tub the day before(she is allergic to herself it helps disinfect her) so I am thinking fur ball or something.  NOPE it was a poo nugget.  Human at that.  Sadly with having pets I can tell the difference between to the different types.  I even asked who did it and if so why.  It got blamed on the cat.  Which it was not.  My friend Michelle tells me today that I am the shit detective.  This may be true.  I am also the who peed all over the bathroom detective.  And the why in the hell is there half sucked on skittles under the bed stuck to the carpet.

No one in my house (the boys) seem to ever be to blame for anything that happens.  If something got broken, NOT ME did it.  It the bathroom floor has 2 inches of water after all baths and showers are taken, NOT ME did it.  Not me also leaves socks and clothes in the living room.  Not me leaves book bags and shoes right in front of the door.  Not me needs there ass beat if you ask me.  But since no one tells me who does things they just get to hear me bitch and complain about the things that go on.  Without a guilty party who do you punish?  I tried the all 3 thing once.  Noah was a non-guilty party and I damn near scarred him for life.  So I don't do that anymore.

I do love my children very much but some days I want to strangle the life out of them.  It will be ok they will turn 18ish and move out and go to college or into the military.  Or when they start dating and I have all this shit compiled and I tell there little girlfriends the crap that they did when they were younger....literally.  That's a joy of being a parent is one day making your kids life a living hell or give them bad ju-ju and put the curse on them.  Ya know the "I hope your kids act just like you did".  Because it always always happens and life is a bitch kids.